


Cracks

by VanessaWolfie



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, F/M, First War with Voldemort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-18
Updated: 2015-08-18
Packaged: 2018-04-15 09:37:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4601865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VanessaWolfie/pseuds/VanessaWolfie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As long as Remus was watching, they never showed again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cracks

**Author's Note:**

> This is one of my old Remus/Sirius fic from somewhere deep within my documents folder. I might be inspired to write more of this Sirius though. Hope you like it.

“Sirius, stop worrying so much! I thought that was my job,” Remus said, looking up from their couch at a pacing Sirius.

“Which is why I don’t understand why you’re so bloody calm about this. She’s pregnant! Now! And they’re happy about it, which is crazy. Perfect time to have a baby, in the middle of a war!”

With that he collapsed into a chair. Remus’ heart ached for the worry and care etched into his boyfriend’s face. It was almost tragic to see Sirius respond like this to the news because if times were different, he’d be jumping with joy for Lily and James. He’d be running out to shop for the baby.

Remus wasn’t even sure what to do. He’d never seen Sirius like this. He was always on the other side, bringing Remus from his worrying, calming him down. It’d been their way ever since they became friends. If Sirius would see Remus huddled in some corner, giving off his usual worry-tics, Sirius would go over and drag him off to have some fun. Take his mind of things and if Remus wanted to talk about it, Sirius would just sit there and listen. Maybe that was what Sirius needed now.

“Padfoot, it’s a baby! It’s light in these dark times. Please see that this is good,” Remus pleaded.

He hadn’t even closed his mouth when Sirius rushed to his feet again and started pacing even faster.

“It’s a baby, Remus. Do you remember how those start out? Little, defenceless and breakable. Do you think Voldemort will care that it can’t defend itself? No, he’s a merciless monster and he won’t care.” By this point, Remus could see Sirius was shaking with emotion. He looked like he was on the verge of tears. “I can’t stand the thought of losing any of you. When you’re not home, I wake up in the middle of the night, screaming your name because I dreamthat you are dead, killed. So how am I supposed to be happy that they’ll be adding to that group, to that worry, that pain, by bringing a defenceless child into this war,” Sirius, his words starting unsteady, but getting stronger as he went on.

As he finished, Remus pulled him down on the couch beside him. Locking his arms around Sirius, he could feel him trembling under his hands.

“I broke down when he died, Remus. I didn’t even like him, hadn’t even really seen him in years.. I’m scared what will happen if you, James or Lily die. I’m not sure I can manage having a baby in that mix,” Sirius whispered, his voice rough.

Remus winced as he thought about Regulus. When Sirius had gotten the news, he’d closed off for about a week. Each time Remus tried to talk to him, he’d insist he was fine, but he’d still kick Remus out and Remus would hear him crying as soon as the door closed. Clearing his mind with a shake of his head, Remus started whispering back to Sirius little nonsense words for comfort. When Sirius stopped shaking, he pulled away and sat up a little straighter.

“Want to go congratulate them?” he said, startling Remus with his change of mind.

He knew better than to look the gift horse in the mouth though, so he just stood up and grabbed Sirius by the arm.

“Sure,”

That was the last time Remus saw Sirius break down about the baby. He was all smiles and happiness at James and Lily’s house and he was the coolest “uncle” a newborn baby could have. Still, as long as Remus could, he kept a close eye on Sirius, just waiting for those cracks to show again. While Remus watched, they didn’t.

 


End file.
